*SERIES* “Love & A Photo”: Claudia & Paul

*Name:*

Claudia & Paul Robinson

*Age:*

Claudia: I just turned 39.

Paul: 34, she’s a true Mrs. Robinson in every sense of the name.

*Lifes’ Work:*

Claudia: Mother, Wife & Photographer, and not always in that order and sometimes all at once.

Paul: Lineman, I’m the guy you see hanging from a bucket, tangled in the wires, making sure your power stays on. I experienced Katrina in LA, talk about coming home with an appreciation for what you have, regardless of how limited it may have appeared before.

*What city do you live in:*

Claudia & Paul: Yarmouth, Cape Cod in Massachusetts.

*How long have you been together:*

Claudia: It will be 11 years this August.

Paul: Too long. KIDDING! KIDDING!

*How & where did you meet?*

Claudia: At a bar. I was recently widowed and found myself drowning my sorrow in a glass of whiskey when I looked up and saw him walk in. I knew pretty much everyone at the bar, it was one of those ‘Cheers’ kinda places for the down and out, so I was curious. I asked the bartender about him and she gave me the 411. We bantered back and forth and hit it off right away. A few drinks later, a massage and a pool game, and it was love at first hangover.

Paul: If she says she let me win the pool game, don’t listen. I won fair and square. The truth is that we made a deal that the person that won the game got to take the other one home. When I adopted her son a few years later, the Judge at the Courthouse asked him if he knew how his parents had met. My son didn’t even blink, he looked at the Judge and said, “Mom won Dad in a game of pool.” The Judge signed the papers there and then, probably because he wanted us out of the room so he could finally laugh his ass off.

*What was your first impression?*

Claudia: God, he’s 6’2, tall, muscular, dark and handsome. He had on tight jeans and cowboy boots and since he’d just come out of the ARMY a high and tight, he was so different than the regular guys that frequented the bar. So strong and self-assured. I was smitten. Instantly.  I found myself wishing I had dressed up, I think I had a man’s shirt on that night. Hot, huh?

Paul: She had jeans on and a plaid lumberjack shirt with work boots. Her hair was pulled up in a messy ponytail and I think the only make-up she had on was lip-gloss. But god, she smelled good. And she had this killer attitude. I had just got out of the ARMY, I wasn’t looking for anything, but she wasn’t just anything. She just seemed to ‘be’. She had moxie.  She was funny as hell, too. And short. Cute and short.

*Describe your first date.*

Claudia: At the time I was working as the Assistant Manager of a hotel on the water. As a bonus I managed to get three first class tickets to Nantucket Island on the Hyline Cruise. Paul, myself and my 15 mos. Old son, Kyle, went over for the day. It’s probably one of the best memories I have of the beginning of our courtship. My heart had been so hard, so cold, so cynical for so long that it just felt amazing to let it crack open and feel again. When Paul hoisted Kyle up on to his shoulders, or splashed with him in the puddles until the only dry clothes either of them had were underwear, I knew I had something special. Yeah, I was scared to death to love again, but Paul made it so easy, made it feel so right. He wanted to take care of us, and until that day, I’d always been the one doing the ‘taking care of’.

Paul: We spent the day on the Island. It was the first time I had a chance to really get to know her son, and see her in action as a Mother. I confess I hid the fact that she was a widow and a single mother from my parents and friends in the beginning, afraid of what they would say, but after that day, I realized it was who she was, what made her Claudia. She wasn’t about primping and fawning, she didn’t have time to do that. She was this amazing mother with this super kid, who still managed to make me feel like a King when we were alone, and that day kinda made me realize I was exactly where and with the person I was supposed to be. I got shit from my friends, but she eventually worked her charm on them, too. My parents LOVED her.

*Tell me about the most funny thing your partner ever did to “impress” you.*

Claudia: Buffet tickets. The very next day after we met. He walked in to my house and told me, rather than asked me, that we were going. I had honestly assumed that he’d just been another one night stand and I’d never seen him again. Prepared myself for that really. When he walked in the door and propositioned me with these tickets I felt relief and I couldn’t stop laughing. C’mon, Buffet for a second date? That’s awesome.

Paul: Her first thanksgiving. She’d never cooked a turkey before but so very badly wanted to make it a family thing for us all and to show me she was ‘wife material’. She didn’t know there were giblets in the turkey to be removed, and she assumed a turkey took as long as chicken. I think we had spaghetti in the end, and we laughed so hard at the horribleness of the meal. That was the last time she made something crappy. 11 years later she’s the most amazing chef. We still laugh about her dinner though, every Thanksgiving.

*When did you know it was love?*

Claudia: God, it’s so cliché, that whole ‘love at first site’ thing, but I honestly believe there is a thread between humans, invisible, that tightens and pulls when two people who work well together, meet. I saw him and my heart stopped and took notice. When he kissed me the first time, nothing else in the world existed. I kinda knew. But it wasn’t until I saw him interacting with my son…yeah, that’s when I knew for sure I’d found my other, better, half.

Paul: It took me a little bit longer to admit to love. I liked her, was crazy about her, but I was only 23. I was wild, and still plundering and pillaging with my college and ARMY buds. She was 29. A woman with a child. Already married once. She was wild too, but obviously her priorities were a little different than mine. I think once I realized she didn’t care that I still needed my friends and my guy time, didn’t want to take that away from me, in fact encouraged it, and eventually even adored my best friend (and vice versa), that I knew I loved her.

*Are you guys more of “perfect twins” or “opposite attracts”?*

Claudia: Opposites. Definitely. I am a worry wart, a consummate control freak and totally type A. I wear my emotions on my sleeve and use a loudspeaker to express them. Paul is the most laid back, relaxed, live and let live kinda guy you could find. He keeps me sane.

Paul: Opposites. She’s a nut case. And I mean that in a good way.

*Retell the coolest travel adventure that you have taken together*

Claudia: I’d have to say our trip to upstate NY in the pouring rain on the back of the motorcycle. 4.5 hours of cold rain, truck sluiced waves of water on the highway, pit stops at rest areas to dry our hair, people staring at us like we were insane. It was awesome. You survive that kinda excursion and you can do anything together. I earned my official ‘biker bitch’ badge that day.

Paul: Yeah, I have to agree. She was a GREAT sport. I was totally surprised at how well she handled that! It could have been a nightmare. Instead she laughed the entire way.

*How do you share your creativity/gifts with the world?*

Claudia: Photography and writing. Mostly behind the lens of my camera. I love seeing the world and then capturing it. My memory blows. I’m going to be one of those doddering old ladies who loses her way all the time, capturing my life with photos ensures I’ll remember some of it.

Paul: I’m not creative. Not at all. Unless you consider finding routes to travel on a motorcycle that include spots she can take pictures of, creative. She’s the creative one. I’m the cheerleader. With hairy legs.

*What was your first disagreement about?*

Claudia: Money. Lack thereof or how to spend/save it when we do have it..

Paul: Sadly, she’s right. Any fights we have has to do with money, savings and investments. Money sucks.

*What do you do after a ‘fight’?*

Claudia: Sex. Make up sex. Sweaty, bed rocking, hair pulling, angry makeup sex.

Paul: Amen. Are you mad now by any chance?

*Have you faced any adversity? If so, and you care to share- what…*

Claudia: Cancer. Me. Scary as hell. I’m a survivor, and I say that with pride, but I would never, ever have managed to beat it were it not for his strength and unconditional love. When you think you’re about to check out, perspectives get altered and priorities fall in to place. He was and is my rock. And of course there are the adversities that any married couple faces, the ups and downs that flesh out a marriage. We’ve suffered and survived a few doozies during the 11 years we’ve been together, and I’m sure there are more to come, but if you really love someone, really want to spend the rest of your life with them, you learn to pick and choose your battles early on.

Paul: Fear makes you strong. It was a very scary time. But it made us stronger in the end. Adversity is unavoidable in any relationship. If any couple claims otherwise they are lying and sailing the river denial. Without a lifejacket.

*Describe your love journey in 3 words.*

Claudia: Road less traveled.

Paul: Rock & Roll.

*For the marrieds, how has life changed since you got hitched?*

Claudia: Of course. You begin to think for more than yourself. I becomes we. Sometimes it comes naturally, other times you wish for me I time. Part of the journey is being able to blend and separate, create a balance.

Paul: The ability to just get up and go is impeded. You have a family to think about. You look at the motorcycle in the garage and remember the days of a backpack and nothing else, you and the road. Now you have to make sure you’ve got a map, tampons and…kidding. She said it right, you have to find a balance between who you were and who you’ve become and respect the space between the two, giving and taking as needed.

*Bonus Question: What is your favorite beverage?*

Claudia: Cabernet Sauvignon. Without a doubt.

Paul: Ginger and Jack. NO fruit.